Nonfiction Book Reviews

I ran across another Today.com blog entitled The Librarian.  Delighted, I clicked on it.  How fun that there was another Today blogger who was a librarian!

She related the following story on her site - I’m pasting the most hilarious part below, but follow the link if you want to read the whole thing:

Two years later, she’s still coming in and still asking questions about her future, like we’re some kind of Magic 8 Ball come to life. I mean, I know the sign above the desk says INFORMATION, but that’s not really what it means. Her questions now are more specific, like “Do you think I’ll win $70 million from the lawsuit against my job?” She says she’s suing her boss because he’s mean to her. Or “Do you think I’ll marry a tall Italian man who drives a BMW?”

And while she used to just frown when you said you didn’t know or shrugged, now she gets ANGRY and huffs at you. Oh, yeah and she really hates me because I won’t answer her questions. She asked me not long ago if I liked working at the Library and I told her I did. She wrote me a sweet little note that said I DON’T LIKE YOU WORKING HERE.

Lovely.

I almost snorted my water up my nose when I read this (a hazard of browsing the internet and drinking at the same time). A patron who honestly seemed to think that the reference desk should not only be able to tell her where the atlases are at, but also peer into the future, and tell her what her fate is going to be?  Oh c’mon peoples, you just can’t make this kind of thing up!

I started to think about how, exactly, this was supposed to work. This is what I came up with: What if, after the librarian finishes school, master’s degree proudly in hand, she’s suddenly imbued with a magical ability to read palms and foretell the future?  Switch the tassel from one side of the cap to the other, and BAM! Here comes all of the psychic abilities.

I tell you what, I’m feeling significantly ripped off by the reference desk at my library, because never once has any of them told me what numbers to use when buying a ticket for Powerball, nor accurately foretold even so much as the weather. Hey, they are the “Information” desk - shouldn’t they be able to tell me anything and everything I want to know?

For any of you who are down on your luck, and need a bit of extra cash to make it through, be sure to stop by your local library before hitting your gas station, so you can have your lucky numbers in hand. Give yourself plenty of time though - when word of this spreads, the lines are going to be insane.  Forget the lines at Disneyland - this is so much better than a three minute ride through “It’s a Small World.”  We’re talking months of camping out here.  Black Friday times, like, a million.

Just remember, Almighty Reference Ladies, I was the first to know about this magical power, so you have to help me first.

Hava
Who is off to go plan how she’ll spend her millions of dollars…

Money for Nothing: One Man’s Journey Through the Dark Side of Lottery Millions by Edward Ugel was not about a guy winning the lottery, as I had originally thought it was.  Instead, Mr. Ugel worked in the lump-sum business: Basically, if someone was receiving an annuity payment over the course of 20 years because of winning the lottery, he would buy them out upfront and give a lump settlement to them, all for a fee, of course.  He made very good money, but it was an extremely competitive business and some of the tactics he used to find and sign up lottery winners was, to put it nicely, cutthroat.  He never broke any laws, but he did use some amazing salesmanship to “get ‘er done.”

It’s a fast-paced read - I finished the 235-page novel in just one day - and overall, I enjoyed it quite a bit.  There were several things that detracted from the novel though: First, the author didn’t shy away from using swear words.  If this were a movie, it would be rated PG-13 just for the language.  Yeah, sure, cutthroat salesmen probably weren’t worried about whether their language was clean or not, and I realize that it’s realistic this way, but still, I’m not a fan of swear words, and that did bother me.  Second, the author tended to tell stories within stories, and jump back and forth through time without explaining what he was doing.  The book is not organized chronologically, and he would refer to his wife, then fiancée, then child being born, then suddenly she’s his fiancée again.  I never quite knew where in time we were at.  And he’d also start telling a story, then start another story, go back to the first story, start a third story, then finally finish the first one.  For a speedreader like me, that was hard to keep up with.

It was worth jumping through time though, because the stories were absolutely fascinating.  I kept thinking to myself, “Why aren’t any of these people smart about the money?  Why do they blow through the money so quickly?” And then of course the requisite, “If I won millions in a lottery, I would be smart about it.” Which I believed all the way until I got to the end of the book, where Mr Ugel made the following statement:

“If you were handed a thousand dollars, if you won it out of the blue, what would you do with it? No lying.  Yeah, I’d blow it too.  Now, if you were made to dig a ditch or paint a house, or do any job for a day or two in order to receive that same money, what would you do with it then? Exactly. Me too.  Bills are bills.

“Earned money is more valuable than found money because it is more valued.” Page 207, Money for Nothing

Touché, Mr Ugel.

Anyway, if you don’t mind a PG-13 book because of language and gambling (no sexual scenes, murder, or drugs in it anywhere, just swearing, drinking, and gambling) then you’ll be fine with this book.  And if you’re wanting to know more about the gambling industry, lottery winners, and the lump-sum business, then you’ll thoroughly enjoy this book.  I learned some pretty interesting facts, like the idea that lotteries help fund education is a bunch of bull, which took me by surprise because I live in a lottery state and I am constantly watching ads on TV about how lotteries help our schools prosper, blah blah.  Turns out that is a complete lie.  The government, lie about money?  Never.  I know, I know, shocking.

I give Money for Nothing 4.25 out of 5 stars.

Havs